Jesse Bear, What Will You Wear?

Did you know, that even though it is hard being a mom, that I would rather do that than anything else in the world? I would rather be a mommy to my Tommy even if it means I don't get to do what I want most of the time.

Tommy at 3 weeks

And though when I need to get things done, I don't get to do it when I want to. Even if going places is a huge ordeal, or my breasts ache and leak and make me feel like I have zero control over my body.

Even if it means I have post-pregnancy tummy chub that I need to get rid of, and am still healing from an episiotomy seven weeks old. Even though I am so tired that my head bobs when I sit still, or I accidentally run into walls because I can't walk in a straight line. Even though I no longer recognize my body for the fact that I went from a cup B to cup E and have a heck of a time trying to find clothes that fit (I want my B's back!).

Even though my sheets have traces of dried spit-up and pee from the last seven weeks because there is always laundry, and clothes are more of a priority than sheets. Even though Tommy poops all over his changing table pad as soon as I wash it, and pees and poops on me daily.

.

Why?

Because nothing in the world feels better than to have him fall asleep in my arms with his head nestled on my shoulder. I sit quietly, listening to his soft breathing and sighs as he peacefully sleeps. I cherish the feel of his milk-scented breath on my neck, his soft cheek resting on my shoulder. His small hand wrapped around my arm, holding me and trusting me because I am his mommy. He is my baby, and I love him.

Tommy at 6 weeks